Everything’s falling apart

Subtitle: A Day. A picture. A song. (19)

Today I’ll be not connecting to very much of you visitors. 26 years ago I was a total emo inside. Listening to post-hardcore (or emocore) all day long and dripping misery out of every cell inside my body. Bathing in self destructive thoughts. And every year appear days I feel a low tide coming and this now buried (or healed) part of me resurrect for a few moments. There are these special songs from that time I’ll always like to listen again, even to help mood management myself more into an emotional state or just to lead these emotions a way out of me. Thursdays “I am the killer” is one of them.

In a weird way this song stucked with me from the first listening and everytime it’s melody rushes into my ears. There is an ambiguity in the lyrics I’ll like as much as just hearing to raw power of guitars and drums. It must be about coming to terms with no fixing the past. At some point you, or I, had to get out of the prison cell I made myself, to escape the whirlwind of spiraling thoughts and learn to be a social human again.

Instead of just showing a middlefinger to everyone, even the most beloved friends and partners.

Josi and others at BRN, Dresden (05.06.10)